Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Writing a Professional Biography

I think most folks can feel me on this one...it is no fun writing resumes or bios of ourselves. Turner Residential (this is the brokerage where I run my business) is planning a major website redesign and I will need to freshen up my information. When faced with this task a few years back, here's one of the "gems" I came up with prior to breaking down and submitting a pretty innoucuous, but accurate bio.that can be viewed at www.turnerresidential.com. Please keep in mind that this faux bio is ficticious, satirical and all in good fun.

Real Estatic Force

Brandi Weber is a real estatic force. If there was one word to describe Brandi and her approach to real estate it would be Kafkaesque. Brandi Weber is the Eddie Van Halen of real estate. When it comes to real estate Brandi Weber’s philosophy is “take no prisoners”. Brandi Weber brings a “take no prisoners” and also a “no holds barred” approach to real estate. Brandi is like an ultimate fighter when it comes to doing her job….which is real estate. This means she is not afraid to punch someone in the nuts if that’s what needs to happen. If real estate were a violin, Brandi Weber would be a virtuoso. Brandi Weber is the Harvey Keitel of real estate. Brandi Weber wakes up every morning and eats an entire house for breakfast. Brandi Weber does not believe in God, she believes in real estate. Once, Brandi Weber gave birth….to real estate.

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